Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
