Whats the glycemic index on semen?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
