Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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