i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize