Acid is not a monday night drug
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
