It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
