This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
