what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Randomize
