MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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