Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
