You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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