Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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