she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
