Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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