this boner is exhausting
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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