So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Sober January is a disaster.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
