I want to walk on stilts...naked
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
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