We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize