You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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