Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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