ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
