i don't plan on having that self control this summer
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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