Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
