HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
