Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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