i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize