She announced her abortion via fbk
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize