we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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