LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
