Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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