Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
