I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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