Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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