What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize