if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
My dick has a subreddit
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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