Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
