she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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