Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
