Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize