I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
