its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
