I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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