Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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