Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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