so that wasnt chicken after all
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize