she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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