This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
