It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
