i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
