i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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